35 Lessons from 35 Years: Reflections on Becoming Water

Today, I turn 35.

Thirty-five years of living, loving, losing, learning, and becoming.
Thirty-five years of shedding layers, remembering my essence, and returning to flow.

This year, I celebrate by releasing my debut poetic memoir, I AM WATER — a collection of 15 poems that mirror my journey as a daughter of the African soil. Each poem is a drop in the river of my becoming — exploring love, sovereignty, freedom, loss, magic, and the quiet grace that comes from healing and remembering who I am.

As I honour this new chapter, I want to share 35 lessons that have shaped me — truths gathered from the storms and still waters of my life.

35 Lessons from 35 Years

1. You are allowed to change your mind. Growth requires flexibility.
2. Healing is not linear. Some days you swim, other days you float — both are progress.
3. Silence can be sacred. Not everything needs to be explained or defended.
4. Love begins with self-respect. The relationships around you reflect the one within you.
5. Forgiveness is a daily practice. Especially toward yourself.
6. You are not behind. Life is not a race; it’s a rhythm.
7. Your body holds wisdom. Listen to its whispers before they become screams.
8. Creativity is prayer. It’s how the soul remembers itself.
9. Boundaries are love in action.
10. Rest is revolutionary. Productivity without peace is just noise.
11. Your ancestors walk with you. Honour them through how you live.
12. Joy is not frivolous. It’s medicine.
13. Pain can be a portal. Let it teach you, not define you.
14. You do not need to shrink to belong.
15. Gratitude transforms scarcity into sufficiency.
16. Nature mirrors truth. Watch the seasons — they will teach you about letting go.
17. Faith is not certainty. It’s trust in movement.
18. The right people recognise your light. You don’t have to convince them.
19. Minimalism is not about less things — it’s about more space.
20. Money is energy. Flow with it, don’t chase it.
21. You can’t save everyone. But you can love consciously.
22. Solitude is not loneliness. It’s sacred communion.
23. Speak your truth, even if your voice shakes.
24. You are not your trauma. You are who you choose to become after it.
25. Art heals. Every word, every colour, every sound matters.
26. Don’t rush your becoming. Some flowers bloom late, and that’s their magic.
27. Listen deeply — to people, to your intuition, to the wind.
28. Be intentional with your energy. Where attention goes, life grows.
29. Your dreams are instructions. Treat them like sacred messages.
30. Community is medicine. Healing happens in circles, not in isolation.
31. Courage is quiet. Sometimes it looks like showing up again.
32. You are allowed to start over — again and again.
33. Water teaches resilience. It yields, but it never disappears.
34. There is no arrival point — only deeper presence.
35. You are water. Flow, heal, nourish, and become.

At 35, I honour both the softness and strength that have carried me here. I celebrate the storms that shaped my shores, the rivers that led me home, and the ocean of grace that continues to hold me.

I AM WATER is not just a book — it is a declaration of return. A return to essence. A return to flow.

Thank you to everyone who has witnessed, supported, and held space for my journey.

You can order a signed, limited edition copy of I AM WATER via DM or through my blog, lammas.africa.

The self-titled soundtrack, Bohlale ba Tau and the I Am Water poetic memoir are also available on all major streaming platforms.

Here’s to 35 years of becoming — and to the endless current that carries us all home.

Bohlale Lerato Masera-Sibanda (Bohlale ba Tau)